Me And My Big Mouth

3U2

Full marks to U2 for making their new album, No Line On The Horizon, available to listen to for free prior to release next week. You can hear it on all manner of social networking pages, retailer sites and music communities. I gave it a spin on Spotify myself.

13 albums and 32 years (or something like that) into their career and it is fair to say that they will have quite a few lapsed fans out there. A couple of not-that-great albums in the past decade won't have helped things either. So, what better way of luring them back than letting them hear the new songs? Advance press was touting this as their best since Achtung Baby so there'll be loads of people prepared to check them out.

All of this makes a bit of a mockery of the publishing world which is still all fingers and thumbs when it comes to free content. There are significant exceptions but the industry as a whole is pretty poor in this regard. In the coming weeks The Friday Project will be making much of its list available to read online for free. At least we will once we can get the new website up and running. Technical bollocks holding things up at the moment.

But back to Bono and his mates. I do genuinely think it is great that they have done this and I did my bit by listening to the bloody thing. Unfortunately, and this is always the catch to giving people access to anything for nowt, I didn't really like it. I found it rather dull, to be honest. I am not a U2 fan but I don't object to them. I was working behind the counter at HMV Southend when Achtung Baby came out (the same day as Dangerous by Michael Jackson) and it was a groundbreaking album. It was daring and different and experimental and popular. I preferred It's a Shame About Ray myself but most customers disagreed with me.

But if Achtung Baby was brave and bold, No Line On The Horizon is run of the mill, muffled, a collection of songs with no real oomph. It is an unfair comparison really, especially given the time that has elapsed, but I don't think many of the new songs would have made it as b-sides to Achtung Baby singles, let alone get on to the album itself. NLOTH simply doesn't rock enough. It plods.

Ironically, the two best songs are White As Snow and Cedars Of Lebanon. Both are stripped back, stark ballads reminiscent of the Johnny Cash American Recordings. If we had been offered a whole album of these then I suspect we would genuinely be hailing a return to form, a classic for the 21st century, a collection of songs that people would be listening to in decades to come. As it is I would be suprised if NLOTH is being played by more than a handful of fans once the world tour is over. A shame really.

The cover is gorgeous though.

I Like This: Stack Magazines

For the first time in over twenty years of listening to Radio 4 I actually heard something interesting on You & Yours. It was a feature on Stack Magazines.

Stack are a little like LoveFilm, but for mags. And you get to keep them.

You subscribe for £3 a month and every month you get sent an independent magazine. You can cancel whenever you want and you can make sure they don't send you issues of titles you already have or subscribe to.

And they sometimes even send some surplus copies out for free.

I really like the idea and think I will give it a go for a while to widen my reading horizons.

Hens, Chickens & Librarians

On Wednesday I had a rare night on the town on London.

First up, myself and the lovely Heather from The Friday Project, went out for dinner at Sen Nin, a Japanese teppanyaki restaurant in Islington. I had never been to a teppanyaki before and it was quite an experience. You sit in a communal booth around a big hotplate and your chef cooks your food, complete with spatchelor acrobatics, in front of you. Our guy had us flipping raw eggs into chef hats, trying to catch food in our mouths and dished up a series of fantastic dishes. The kids would love it so I will have to see if there is somewhere similar nearer home. I do recommend it. Reasonably priced and jolly good fun. It was a bit like this:

Having filled my innards with grub, I said farewell to Heather and popped across the road to see bestselling novelist, talkative lass and good friend Marie Phillips perform live on stage in More Than Just The Library at the Hen & Chickens. This one-hour show was split into two. The first half was a series of sketches written by Marie and Robbie Hudson. The second was a reading of a new sit-com called The Library, written by Robbie again but this time with Julia Lovell. Both were very much works in progress and the cast were reading from scripts but I quickly forgot that because I was laughing so much.

The sketches were a surreal mix of jokes about relationships, politics, the media and modern life weaved around two running gags - one a piss-take of television news (quite funny but probably not quite funny enough to sustain the whole thread), the other a reworking of Strangers on a Train (the best thing in the show). If this had been on the telly I would have series linked the forthcoming episodes. Clever comedy without being too clever, just how I like it.

The sit-com was a surreal blend of Black Books and The Mighty Boosh. The cast really ran with it (I was particularly impressed by Gus Brown who was brilliant in both halves) and I can imagine it filling a late night BBC3 slot quite comfortably.

All in all a top evening's entertainment. Presumably Sen Nin is open every night but you only have one more chance to see More Than Just The Library. It is on again tonight at the Hen & Chickens, although I am guessing it is close to being sold out. Worth getting a ticket if you can though.

Sorry Howard

Blimey, Howard Male got everyone stirred up.

Sorry Howard, I didn't mean to set the hounds on you. It was just that your response to my review made me question why I put time aside to read chunks of everything I am sent. Perhaps it is a hangover from my Waterstone's days when I had piles and piles to get through. Anyway, it was good to hear that the Quick Flicks work for people but at the expense of you getting a whupping in the comments which was completely my fault. Apologies. I have been the subject/victim/stooge of many a public character assassination and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. Except for Tim Adams, of course. And Nick Cohen. And Norman Lebrecht. Feel free to say anything you want about them.

I am now sorely tempted to read the whole of Howard's book but then if I don't like it and post a negative review then the Furies really will be after me. Perhaps I won't go there.

I do like the sound of Howard's wife though, her comment of "Are you mad? That's a good review! What's wrong with you? Can't I leave you alone for ten minutes?" made me smile. Although I am not hitting on her. Honest. I am in enough trouble with the Male household as it is.

So Howard, best of luck with your book. I hope you aren't too bashed and bruised and if you are ever down my way I shall treat you to some tea and cake. You only have to sample a bite or two - no need to finish it or anything.

Foxy

Two notable honours for The Blue Fox by Sjon this week.

It has been longlisted for the Independent Foreign Fiction Prize, and a very good choice it is too. Great news for Telegram books who are publishing some fine translations.

But it was also selected last night as the new book in my girlfriend's book group.

He must be chuffed about that second one in particular.

Why Do I Bother?

Oh dear. I seem to have upset someone with one of my reviews.

I am no stranger to upsetting people, especially sensitive literary types as you probably know, but this time I was actually trying to be nice.

Here's what happened. A self-published author sent me a copy of his book. I read a bit, thought it was OK if nothing special but wanted to give it a mention nonetheless. I like to give a bit of airtime to small presses and self-published authors if I can and tend to prioritse their books over those from major publishers.

Normally I would feature the book in my Quick Flicks sidebar. These are short reviews based on, you've guessed it, a quick flick. Quite how much of a flick varies but usually I have read 50 pages or so. Naturally, not every book that gets the flick treatment then goes on to my To Be Read pile but I try to post sufficient information to pique your interest. Judging by my Amazon stats quite a few people do buy books based on these mini reviews.

Because of the way Typepad is set up I can only feature a book if it has an ISBN and is listed on Amazon. The book in question did not and was not, but rather than ignore it I wrote a brief post within my main blog. You can read it here.

And if you scroll down once you have clicked through you can also read the author's complaint.

Now, he has a point. I cannot possibly understand the book or do it justice if I do not read the whole thing. I couldn't agree more, but then I don't claim to be doing either. As should be obvious from the title of the blog post, I am offering a quick impression, nothing more. Granted, that impression may change if I perservered with the whole thing, although in six years of buying books for a living that rarely actually happened.

I could argue that if he had written a better book then I would have read more of it, and I would also have a point, but instead I thought I would focus on the positive. Although in doing so I seem to have pissed him off. That wasn't my intention.

I find it interesting that in two and a half years of blogging I have only received four complaints about reviews I have posted (or not posted) on here. All of these were from self-published authors. Does that tell us anything? Two felt that I could have been more fulsome with my praise (which I would have been if their books had been more than just average), another was cross that I hadn't reviewed his book (it was shit and I wish I had) and now this.

On the flipside, the same day that Mr Male left his comment I received a lovely email from Random House thanking me for my Quick Flick review of the Reif Larsen novel. They aren't the first to have done so either.

Perhaps I am trying too hard to give a mention to everything that comes my way, and maybe my desire to be as positive as possible about books from small presses and self-published authors is counter-productive, but that isn't going to stop me trying to do my, albeit rather small, bit to give them some profile.

All I will say is that if you send me a book to review then do bear in mind that I will review it any bloody way I want, be that a full review, mini-review, quick flick, vitriolic sentence, rhyming couplet, mime, origami, semaphore or rock opera.

So there.

Free Therapy

A few weeks ago I posted a Quick Flick entry in the sidebar about Tim Atkinson's novel Writing Therapy. Tim has kindly donated two copies of the book for readers of this blog.

There is a catch, but it is the usual one. You just have to read it and review it online asap.

I asked Tim to offer up a few words to explain the book:

Two things got me started on it: one, teenage mental illness and the stigma attached - a book in with a protagonist who struggles with depression and triumphs (writing a novel) might help someone, somewhere (so I thought - although 10% of the book's royalties are going to the charity Young Minds www.youngminds.org.uk though, so someone's benefitting); second, the way we all (especially bloggers, twitterers and so on!) make fiction of our own lives, if only in the editing. Where does fact end and fiction begin? That's the central question in Writing Therapy.

A third element – which emerged most powerfully as I started writing - was a desire to do something different. What's the point of writing something someone else might easily have written (and written better)? That might explain the 'tricksy' elements you mentioned, and maybe it's too tall-an order for a debut novelist. But it's there, between the lines.

Is that enough? Of course, I could go on, adding - a la Wittgenstein - my thoughts on the empirical verifiability of language. No, thought not.

Drop me a line if you want a copy. The first two mailers get one.

The Money Shot

I hate to be presumptuous but I am guessing that quite a few of you are already familiar with the work of Jenna Jameson. For those who have yet to come across her (sorry) a quick Google search will tell you all you need to know, but you might not want to do it at work as you will almost certainly be in contravention of all manner of company internet policies by doing so.

Jameson is a porn star, possibly the most successful in the history of the dubious industry. Her Briana Loves Jenna DVD broke all known sales records when it was released in 2001. Her Club Jenna website (can't wait to see the exit stats on this one) generates revenue of over $30m a year. She was one of the first porn actresses to truly crossover to mainstream success - she has presented for E! Channel, appeared in Hollywood movies and her autobiography, How to Make Love Like a Porn Star, was published by HarperCollins and spent six weeks on the New York Times bestseller lists.

For a memoir to deliver the goods and be more than just celebrity puff (see any number of Christmas hardbacks over the past couple of years) you need to a) have lived an interesting life and b) write it well. Jenna certainly delivers on the former and cannily enlists Neil Strauss, the man behind the legendary Motley Crue book The Dirt, as ghost writer. He does a fine job and helps to elevate what could have been merely voyeuristic and titillating into a fascinating and worthwhile piece of contemporary literature.

It also has to be said that it is a beautifully produced volume, really gorgeous. Whatever your personal feelings about pornography, as a book you really cannot fail to be impressed. Full of (relatively tame) photographs, including lavish colour plates, as well as facsimile diary pages and comic panel sections, HTMLLAPS just begs to be picked up, handled and, dare I say, fondled.

But once you've given it a good squeeze you do actually need to read the thing. Jameson lays her life bare in these nearly 600 pages. Given the common preconceptions that surround the world of porn you might be expecting a tale of neglect, abuse, drugs, exploitation and excess. Well, you'd be right.

Her life ticks pretty much every stereotyped box on the pornography list. Her mother died of skin cancer when Jenna was just two years old. Her father was largely absent, working to support Jenna and her unruly brother, leaving them in the charge of an array of girlfriends and wives. She was horrifically gang raped while still at school and then again by the uncle of her tattooist boyfriend when only a little older. Despite that she moves in with her boyfriend, a relationship fuelled by drugs and jealousy. She starts stripping and glamour modelling to make a bit of money and ends up filming her first hardcore porn scene just to get even with her boyfriend when she finds out he has been cheating on him. Other unwise decisions follow, including an unnecessary boob job, and she spirals into a breakdown.

Once recovered she launches herself into a full-time porn career, determined to become the most successful porn star ever. And this she does, but with her high profile and highly lucrative porn life parallelled by an equal and opposite series of failed relationships. This is not a tale of glamour and fame, no matter how glossy the book may appear.

What I like about this book, and why I found myself warming to Jenna Jameson, is that she tells it like it is. This is me, this is what I did, this is what I do. I am not saying it is good, bad or to be emulated. It is what it is, warts and all. Take it or leave it. She knows that her past contributed to where she is today, she realises that with a more stable background and a better choice of partner she may never have entered the porn world. But she did, and she tells her story with style and honesty.

The worrying thing is that she doesn't really seem to have learned from her mistakes, certainly when it comes to men. The book ends up at about 2004 or so, as she has just married her second husband. You don't need a degree in relationship counselling to spot that she is walking into another potential disaster, her descriptions of their life together are enough to tell you that. And, sure enough, a quick check on Wikipedia suggests that they have since divorced and that she has undergone even more cosmetic surgery. But while she isn't perhaps quite as together as she'd like you to think in the book, she at least had the balls to lay it all out there.

How to Make Love Like a Porn Star is quite an eye opener, and whether you are pro or anti porn, or even ambivalent, it is likely to alter your opinions somewhat. It isn't comfortable reading, but it isn't meant to be. It is, however, a very good book indeed.

Guest Bloggers: Ethan & Martha

Our dad asked us to tell you about some of the books we have been reading recently.

Ethan. The Hobbit was our bedtime story last month. It was fantastic. It is about a little hobbit who goes on an adventure.

Martha. I liked it too. My favourite book at the moment is The Jumble Book which is a collection of poems that are really funny. I keep reading them out loud to the rest of the family.

Ethan. At the moment I am reading Inkheart by Cornelia Funke. It's about somebody called Meggie and her father. Whenever he reads aloud from a book the characters come alive. I like it because it is a little bit funny and it is very good, basically.

Martha. We also read the new Tumtum & Nutmeg book called The Great Escape. Tumtum and Nutmeg are little mice who live behind a cupboard. General Marchmouse comes to stay with his pogo stick and ends up being captured. It is all a bit crazy.

Ethan. The book dad is reading to us at bedtime at the moment is The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman. It is about a baby who is raised by the dead people in a graveyard after his family are murdered. He grows up in the graveyard and all the ghosts are his friends and teachers.

Martha. I have just picked up Diary of a Wimpy Kid by Jeff Kinney from Ethan's bookshelves. It is really cool so far.

Ethan. I read it last year, it is really cool. Another book I read recently was Zelah Green Queen of Clean by Vanessa Curtis. It is about a girl with OCD. Her mum died from cancer when she was younger and her stepmum is fed up with her so she is sent to a residential clinic to get cured. The other people she meets are really funny. It is a really good book.

Martha. My favourite book ever is The Monkey Pirates by Mark Skelton. My favourite CD at the moment is The Story by Brandi Carlisle. And my favourite movie is Lord of the Rings even though it was scary.

Ethan. My favourite film is also Lord of the Rings. The best CD is the new Killers album but I really like In Silico by Pendulum as well. My favourite book is probably Kensuke's Kingdom by Michael Morpurgo.

Ethan and Martha. Bye!

I'd Like To Thank...

Don't forget, I will be Twittering live from my sofa throughout the Oscar ceremony tonight. It is mainly to keep myself awake but you are more than welcome to join me.

You can read my pointless drivel on Twitter itself or via the feed in the top left hand corner of the blog.

A Song For Sunday

I've had a huge crush in Nina Persson for years. She keeps on producing the most wonderfully dark pop music with both The Cardigans and A Camp. She's a treasure. The more brunette the better though, if you ask me.

A Quick Quick Flick

I usually post my Quick Flick reviews over in the sidebars but Etc Etc Amen by Howard Male (could that be his real name? surely not) is not available on Amazon, so I can't.

It is for sale on lulu.com though so if 'an airport book with ideas about its station', as the author describes it, is your bag then you can pop over there and check it out.

It certainly comes emblazoned with plenty of quotes from some impressive names - David Quantick and Charlie Gillett to name just two - and it is a good read. An ambitious literary thriller with a dollop of religious satire and a sprinking of 70s rock music may be the way to describe it. I must confess it didn't really entice me sufficiently to devour the whole thing but I enjoyed what I did read and if the author can get a bit of word of mouth going then it wouldn't surprise me to see it do quite well.

The Future's So Bright I Gotta Wear Shades

We went to see Bolt in 3D this week. I am a bit of a movie buff and am aware that many of the animation studios see 3D as the future. Disney and Pixar are producing all new releases as 3D features. The technology is all the rage in the horror genre as well.

But is it any good?

Well, we were fairly underwhelmed by it all really. It didn't help that the movie was a below-average animation with a fairly predictable plot. Perhaps if we had seen Toy Story or Spiderwick Chronicles in 3D we may have left the cinema excited at the potential of this new advance in visual wonderment. But we hadn't, and we didn't.

The first ten minutes or so were quite entertaining but I stopped noticing the multi-dimensional effect after a while - the design of the film is more immersive than pointy - and found myself getting a bit annoyed at the dull colours.

You see, rather than a pair of cardboard specs with one red and one green lens, we now have big plastic shades with grey lenses. These presumably are the key to seeing the movie in its full 3D glory but they have the side-effect of reducing the colour. You are watching the film through a grey filter.

The other problem is that I wear spectacles already, and for the 3D glasses to work I have to wear them over the top of my normal ones. This is rather uncomfortable and not an experience I am eager to repeat.

The whole thing was like staring through a Viewmaster for ninety minutes. It didn't kill me but I wouldn't say I enjoyed it all that much.

Most importantly, the kids didn't fall in love with the technology either. They have enjoyed walking around the house in their groovy shades since but haven't mention the film at all. Not a good sign.

The Coraline trailer looked great though.

Lord Of The Dance

Michael Donaghy, it says here, was one of the UK's best-known and best-loved poets. I had never heard of him until two handsome volumes of his work came unannounced through my letterbox from Picador. One is his collected poetry, the other his collected prose.

I dipped into the prose first - a mix of essays, interviews. criticism and assorted digressions - because I rarely enjoy reading poetry and thought this might give me a better chance of warming to the friendly looking chap on the cover (not the one on the left in which he looks a tad sinister).

Much of the content concerns poetry even if all of the actual poems are in the other volume. There is his 'classic ars poetica' (no fucking idea, I had to look it up, apparently it means the art or nature of poetry, Horace and Aristotle were early exponents) Wallflowers which managed in its first few pages to do what no other piece of writing on poetry has ever done - make me feel included, welcome and a member of the gang. There are genuinely funny (not amusing, or witty, but funny) reviews of other poet's books. The interviews are full of warmth and humour. And one of the shorter pieces, May I Make a Suggestion?, is the best advice for a budding poet that I have ever read and is worth the £12.99 asking price alone.

The Shape of the Dance is a wonderful oddity, all the more so as it came to me completely out of the blue.

But what about the poetry? Well, to be honest, I am working on it. They aren't the sort of poems I would immediately warm to but neither, I am delighted to say, are they the sort of inpenetrable guff that I so often struggle with and end up hating. They are, as I have found with his prose, inviting and welcoming. I will need to spend some time with them to really get to know them, but I feel quite happy to do so.

Michael Donaghy died in 2004 at the age of 50. His Collected Poems and The Shape of the Dance are out next month in hardback. They are both worthy of your attention.

Things To Quite Like About David Bellos' Biography Of George Perec

• It is the only major biography of the great man out there.
• It is written by one of his foremost translators, a man who clearly knows and admires his subject.
• If you already own a copy then you can quite like the fact that it is now rather hard to get hold of and selling for up to £50 on Amazon Marketplace.
• It includes translations of some of his shorter work that has never appeared in English.
• Even though it reads as quite academic in style it still manages to convey the cheeky sense of fun so obvious in Perec's work.
• And despite the fact that Jonathan Coe's biography of B.S. Johnson exploded the whole genre this can still just about hold its own.
• Oh, and the cover features this wonderful hair and beard combination.

Things To Love About Georges Perec

• He wrote a 300 page novel without once using the letter E.
• He then wrote a novella where he used all the Es he had left out of the novel - and no other vowels.
• He composed a 500 word palindrome.
• His great novel, Life A User's Manual was composed by imagining a Paris apartment block with the front aspect removed and then telling the story room by room, starting at a certain point and then moving to a new room in a strict sequence of moves, replicating that of a knight on a chess board. Each room was visited only once.
• His final novel was a murder mystery about a novelist who is killed before he can finish writing his book. Perec died before completing it.
• He sported this remarkable hair and beard combination:

Reading John Malkovich

I think I have mentioned before that I keep getting sent this odd magazine called Finch's Quarterly Review. Has anyone else seen it? I have no idea how they got my address or why they send it to me for free but I am not complaining. It is broadsheet newspaper-style magazine with a bunch of articles loosely themed around the arts.

Regular contributors include Emma Thompson, Kevin Spacey and a rather entertaining books column from John Malkovich. The whole thing is a collosal triumph of style over substance but it is good fun and the Malkovich piece is becoming essential reading for me.

In the Spring edition he extols the virtues of Natsuo Kirino and Roberto Bolano as well as recommending a book on Lenin, Stalin and Hitler. He also talks a bit about Dutch writer Arnon Grunberg who sounds bloody marvelous.

Grunberg won the best debut novel award in Holland for Blue Mondays while still in his early 20s. His work was then roundly criticised by the journalist Marek van der Jagr. Things got quite nasty and at one point van der Jagr described Grunberg as a 'dirty Jew' before proceeding to claim that he could write something better himself.

And so van der Jagr wrote a novel called The Story of My Baldness which itself then won the debut novel award. Only it turns out that Grunberg and van der Jagr are one and the same person.

Excellent. That is my kind of story. 'Both' authors have gone straight on to my wishlist.

Prick Up Your Ears

Sorry for not mentioning it before but one of my favourite books of last year, The Elegance of the Hedgehog by Muriel Barbery, is currently the Women's Hour Drama on Radio 4.

It it broadcast twice a day, at 10.45 and 19.45, or you can use the Listen Again feature here.

In a Parisian apartment building, lonely concierge Renee and 12-year-old Paloma, who lives in the building and plans to kill herself on her 13th birthday, are brought together by the sudden death of one of their wealthy neighbours and the arrival of a new owner.

Renee ...... Heather Williams
Paloma ...... Holly Bodimeade
Kakuro Ozu ...... Togo Igawa
Manuela ...... Pippa Haywood
Mme Pallieres ...... Kim Hicks

Director Sara Davies.

The book is steaming up the Amazon charts this week as a result. Hurrah for a small publisher getting some mainstream attention. Well deserved too.

And The Twitter Goes To

As long time readers will know I usually blog live from my sofa on Oscar night. I don't really know why I bother to stay up and watch the whole overly-commercial shindig but I do and I seem to extract some pleasure from it. The past couple of years the ceremony has gone incredibly smoothly (I think it actually under-run last time) and there have been few shock frocks or over-the-top speeches. To be honest, it has been a bit on the dull side.

So I did ponder staying in bed this year but I thought I would give it one last go. But instead of blogging live I shall Twitter the whole shebang instead. My pithy comments and observations will appear in the top right hand corner of the blog on the night, or you can follow me on Twitter itself.

Or you could, very sensibly, not bother at all and get a good night's sleep instead.

Oh, and I will also be placing a bet on every category just to make sure there is something for me to get excited about even if the ceremony gets boring. So, join me and host Huge Action (sorry, Hugh Jackman) next Sunday night/Monday morning. Or not.

In Haste

I am busy being on holiday/writing a book/eating cake/reading books/playing with the kids during half term.

I will post something more substantial soon but for now...

Bellowhead were fantastic live at the Southbank Centre but as it was a free gig far too many people turned up and it was impossible for kids to see anything - which was a shame seeing as it was a show supposedly designed for kids in the first place. The band were joined by storyteller Cat Weatherill, author of one of their favourite books, Barkbelly, but the sound on her mike was crap so they couldn't hear a word she said. We rapidly decamped to the first floor and watched the whole thing through the glass balcony. Ethan and Martha enjoyed it though, which was the main thing.

The Juggler by Sebastian Beaumont is every bit as good as Thirteen. So far. I hope to finish it today.

I am also enjoying reading The Reader magazine. At least I am now I have got past the terrible editorial. Why do they always make them so impenetrable?

MOTC had never seen Charade, so I made her watch it last night. She thought it was every bit as good as I said it was. As if she could ever doubt me.

Keep an eye on Bet of the Day this week. I am off work so will have more time to research and I have every intention of stretching my lead. Not all that difficult while the others keep going backwards but I shall not rest on my laurels. I want to get us to £100 profit by FA Cup Final day.

Oh, check out this excellent review of They is Us by Tama Janowitz. It was turned down by loads of publishers before I got to see it. I suspect it was just far too weird for them. It is somewhat odd but it is also somewhat marvelous. It is wonderful to finally have it out there and for reviewers and readers to give it the thumbs up. I realise that means that the forthcoming Guardian review is bound to be a stinker but we can live in hope. You see, contrary to popular belief, I do quite like literary reviews and it is always nice to read a good review of one of your books. Our hardback of They Is Us is a worldwide limited edition of only 1,000 copies. There are still some left but they are starting to dwindle.

That is rather a lot for someone who is supposedly in haste. I shall bugger off now.